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Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Meltdown @ Magic Kingdom

This past Sunday was one of ‘those’ days.  You know the ones I mean, the anniversary day circled in red on your calendar and around your heart.   October 2 marked eight years since Dave had died.  Yes, life has gone on, and we are doing well, but there is still something about ‘the day’ that makes me want to mark it in some way, both for me and for my girls.
A trip to Disney – his favorite spot- seemed a great way to remember as well as to escape daily life.  The plan was to write messages on a Mickey Balloon to release in front of Cinderella’s Castle (yes, this family of girls is all about the dramatic presentation!)
Then we got to the parking lot…and the meltdown began:

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Happy New Year!


For some reason, to me the New Year always begins in the fall, instead of on January 1.  Maybe it’s all those years of ‘back to school’ newness.    Seems like a time for new beginnings…not to mention school supplies. It is ridiculous that everyone in my house gets so excited about shopping for school supplies!   The smell of a fresh box of crayolas always sends me back to Mrs Claussen’s 2nd grade. 
These days..there are tears mixed in with the excitement of a new school year. 
Slow down, I want to holler. Stop growing up so fast. 
One daughter is looking for her keys as she gets ready to drive herself to high school. Gulp.  Another daughter  is telling me thanks, but no thanks, she can put her own hair in a pony tail and really doesn’t need my help.  Sigh.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

The Guy on the Corner

Sunday mornings, there’s a guy on the corner of an intersection not far from my house.  His name is Scott.  And little by little, one red light at a time, we have become  friends. 
Scott sells the Sunday paper on that corner.  Every week.  Rain or shine.  Blistering heat or freezing cold, he is there.  On our way to church, over the course of the past year, we have brought him coffee when it’s cold and water when it’s hot and an umbrella when it’s pouring. He has given us Christmas cards and Halloween candy.   We try to tip big.  He smiles a lot.  Us,  too.
And in the 3 ½ minutes between stoplights, we have forged an unlikely friendship.   
He is always cheerful.   Always.  Standing on a street corner selling papers, the guy is cheerful!

Monday, February 21, 2011

Silence

There have been times in my life when it felt like God was simply everywhere…every time I pick up my Bible, the Word jumps out at me. My prayer life is vibrant and active – I’m talking and He’s listening and He’s talking and I’m listening. Every time I turn on the radio, the perfect song is playing and I’m instantly in tears. Daily devotional? Yep, right on the money. Phone call from a friend? You guessed it, right on time.

And then there are times like the past few weeks. Times when I pick up my Bible and read and in the middle of my reading my mind has wondered to my grocery list. Times when I hear a song on the radio and know it is a great worship opportunity but I just don’t have it in me. Times when I sit in front of the computer and hope for an encouraging e-mail only to find only a pile of spam messages and solicitations for donations. Times when I am living the Psalmist’s words in Psalm 63 – ‘God you are my God, earnestly I seek you, fervently I long for you in this dry and weary land where there is no water…’

At times like this, the silence is deafening.

The lonely is overwhelming.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Valentine's Day...

Ok, so today is Valentine’s Day. In the excitement and adrenaline of preparing to speak at the Awaken conference this past weekend, the whole ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ thing completely slipped my mind.

And that very thought fills me with such peace that I can barely keep from squealing!

You see, when you are single – whether thrust into it by another’s choice – or slammed into it by loss of a life – or simply always have been ; when you are single, this day of love and candy and love and jewelry and love and candlelit dinners and love and flowers and did I mention love? - this day can be kind of lonely.

This Noah's ark 'two-by-two' holiday parade of celebration can sometimes make you feel awkward and angry and alone.  Kind of like a unicorn standing there alone in the rain while the ark sails away.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Jesus in the Target dressing room

The place: Target dressing room….two nights before a family vacation.
The players: One exhausted mama, one hormonal high schooler and one hungry third-grader.
The scene: Trying to find a few key clothing items to take on the upcoming vacation.

The mood: Stress!

Stress between sisters, stress with the shopping experience, stress coupled with feelings of failure that this should have been done sooner, stress over the struggles with sizes and prices, stress of peer pressure and expectations. Not to mention the anticipation of yet another single mom trip and all the details which that entails.

I sat on the floor in the middle dressing room, a daughter on either side of me in their own rooms. Tensions were high and things were not fitting or too pricey or simply just wrong for what we needed.

Needless to say, our collective manna for the day had long since been depleted.

We really should have all been home in comfy pjs, eating soup and listening to something relaxing.

Instead I sat under the unforgiving fluorescent glare fitting room lights hoping for a fashion miracle to emerge from either side of m e.

Siblings with short fuses quickly began to take out their frustrations on each other…and then on their mama. Does that ever happen in your house? I was headed down the slippery slope of a first class mama meltdown when I heard it.