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Friday, August 23, 2013

Five Minute Friday Here's the deal. Five Minute Friday. You go find the little prompt at the wonderful Lisa-Jo's blog, set the timer and write for five minutes, and then just stop. Where you are, no edits, just publish raw words. After way too much time off, seems to me like a great way to dive back in to writing...
Here is the prompt- write for five minutes on :

'LAST'
ready, set, begin.  

It was like any other family trip, except it wasn’t.
The van, full of two girls and a mama and what it takes to fill a college dorm, would turn around at the end and return with a mama and a sister and a whole lot of empty.

'Welcome Home'... the sign said.  
Wait a minute, what are they talking about? ....home is 600 miles away with me, isn't it? 
And then...
Excitement. Pottery Barn comforter. Roommates. College. Classes. Fluffy new towels. Room Keys.
Scared and excited  all at once.  That was her.  
Nervous and full of hopes and dreams for her.  That was me.
Busy in the doing and the fixing and the hanging pictures and stocking the bathroom and putting on a too small fitted sheet, we avoided the big ‘last’ waiting in the lobby below.
How is it possible to drive away from the blue eyes that captured my heart 18 years ago? The government says she’s grown up now. Seriously?  Your baby is ALWAYS your baby. The old quote that having a child is to choose to forever have your heart walking around outside your body’ is no longer just words, but an ache that I can’t even begin to describe. My. Heart. Hurts. 
Life is full of so many firsts. We capture them in photos and journal them to death and share them all pretty perfect on Facebook.
But there are just as many bittersweet lasts.  Sleeping in a crib. Riding with training wheels. Preschool graduation.  Holding hands across the street. Tub baths and reading aloud and when they stop being the passenger and become- gulp- the driver.
And now...a last goodbye before driving away from the big college move-in. 
Room 402 was in order and the drive ahead was long.  It was time for the last hug.  Not ever.  But the last hug when she was still living in my house and part of my everyday life and eating my Cheerios and making me giggle with stupid make up song lyrics. Wise mommas who have walked this journey before me tell me it is never quite the same again. 
It was time.  ‘Do it quick, mama,’ she said. ‘If you hug me long, I am going to lose it right here in front of the lobby where everyone can see.  Just please hug me quick one last time and go. ‘

And so I did. 

stop.  

3 comments:

Leelee said...

Going away to college is an exciting adventure.

Candy said...

Another first without your husband and a hard one indeed. Thank you for sharing your heart and the heart of your daughter as you closed another chapter of your lives and opened a new one.

Brenda from LA said...

I can see myself in your words - and am doing my best to savor the "at home years" i have left with my sons.........praying for your daughter's smooth adjustment and at college and for your continued great relationship with her.